Say Goodbye to My Heart Tonight!

"Oh oh I want some more, Oh oh what are you waiting for, Say goodbye to my heart tonight"

I've placed myself on a racetrack this month, a racetrack that demanded me to push myself, not to the limit, but a little beyond. The paramount pressure that was lacking in organizing COMUN was omnipresent when it came to organizing Urban Jcharlie. It was tiring and sometimes heartbreaking, but rewarding. The amount of work that went on behind the red curtain of this show was incredible. It was a big show, a big, show! It was all done by the least 30 of us. To raise Rs. 547,000 in one concert, is more than a feat *Discalimer: All funds to be directly banked to the Graduation '11 account...Not a rupee to my pocket...Haha*

The tag reads organized by the Senior Prefects Guild, I don't doubt it, but many of them wasn't ready to give 100%. Quite a dark cloud it was, but in that dark cloud my silver linings had names; Naadira, Kasun, Damithri, Ajmal, Kaveesh, Ammar, Sachitra, Nore, Naveen, Sanji, Gardi, Tash and

Mr. Chamath.

My dark cloud of worries could've easily turned into a thunderstorm, if not for these silver linings. Thanks. All in all it was a satisfying end to a hectic 2 weeks. The concert was beyond par, the audience loved it. My hosting skills were not bad I guess, the crowd was just crazy ass loud. This month has certainly being feeding the egoistic bastard inside me. Haha but I know how to keep it starving.

It was all memories, memories I'm ready to say goodbye to tonight, cause the more I dwell on it the more I realize that there's only a mere 2 weeks left for all of us. How can I live without;

doing handstands on the school rooftop, bunking in the canteen, secret group photos on the headmasters table, changing the staff room timetables, fixing the school skeleton into weird sex positions xD, changing official letters, crazy bike rides, running out of petrol at exactly midnight, cricket on the basketball pitch, coming home at way past midnight on successive days, and all the times we just have pure fun.

I'd say goodbye to them, and with it to my heart, soon.

Life As It Should Be!

I don't know why i took so long to post about it. Oh yeah I was caught up in all the concert work that the rest of my life was put on hold. My week has been like this: Awesome, Awesome, Awesome, Stressed, Stressed, Annoyed. But the aftertaste of it all was pretty sweet.

Colombo Model United Nations 2011 was the sex (Cliche) And being part of the crew who organized it brings forth this wonderful feeling that is a tad euphoric but mainly satisfying. The best part about this year's COMUN organizing committee was the mutual understanding amongst all of us. None of us had paramount stress put on our backs, no protocol was followed, and formality and rules and regulations weren't stamped down. We were just a bunch of people, worked towards one goal, faced the obstacles, and opened our eyes together to personify one dream.

Minseon and Jeremy. Two people I have made a bond with that surpasses friendship. Minseon, is a gem of a friend. Sometimes I wonder whether it's ethereal for a person to be that good at heart. A true friend who understands and knows when you need a hug :) And doesn't get pissed off at my racist Korean jokes ;)
Jeremy: My long lost brother. And I mean it, a long lost elder brother. Man we think alike, diss Minnie alike ;), and make music alike. His amazing trumpet vocals is off the hook. The techno sounds and the beats. In comm, I was beatboxing and he made jazz sounds, the delegates absolutely loved it. Minnie and Jerro, I owe it to you both.

Yep, COMUN was epic, and the best part the last day of it was also my birthday. I've never been so loved in my life. 150 delegates of my committee got together and signed this huge ass card for me. Which was just touching man. And when 450 people got up and sang happy birthday, I loved it, I was an egomaniac haha. Thanks.

I had to compeer the closing ceremony with Ema. And here's what we said.

The proceedings over the last three days have been beyond imaginable to us
these few moments mean alot as it signifies the last chapters of our COMUN
story. A story that was woven over 6 months of tireless efforts and pure fun.
The past 72 hours in our lives have taken us to the next level of diplomacy
and skill. Little may you know how enthusiastic you can be

Last October a bunch of people were called up personally by Dimitra, and told
that they passed the interviews and are selected for the COMUN 2011
Executive Committee.Good times they were, and from that point all of us built
up a mutual understanding amongst us, that cannot be cornered to a
certificate.Togetherness was our thing, and from the visits to OSC, random
visits to KFC,and listening to long anecdotes of our past, we made ourselves
family. A family that spearheaded COMUN 2011 to what it is today.

The Second Committee with Jerro, Minnie and Me








Me and My birthday..So overrated..But Muahaha I liked it..=D










The terrorists getting their briefing for the emergency topic
Epic to the core!

Waiting For The End

This song is absolutely breathtaking. I love Linkin Park. Probably the only rock band that moves me. And 'Waiting for the end' is just as good as they get. Lyrically mesmerising in the simplest of ways, yet knocks on the doors of your complex mind.

Dedicated.

This song moved me so much that it deserved a post all to itself =)

March

March lovely march. How can I even start to comprehend what an awesome month you are. And no who said it's cause I was born in March, it just is awesome. Hands down. March brings out the optimist in me, makes me feel like theres another chance.
I was tangled. Left stranded in a mess of things. Trying to keep up to deadlines with nothing but the spaces between my fingers to let slip the sands of time. I felt like I lost, that zing I always had with my colleagues. If I can be complacent about one quality in me, that's being able to click in to any group of people. Blinded to their perspectives, character or class. But there was a time I started loosing faith is someone, and that someone and I share the same name. Full.
I thought I was loosing faith and trust people had in me. But then came March, and in all it's glory told me that you just made someone think again, and question his conscious for the better.

Now things are falling back in place piece by piece. I'm still at the epicenter of it all, gluing every piece to the wall, little by little, and when the time comes I'll take the steps backward. Until I can see what I've pieced together.
March already has been hectic and exciting. Exciting more. I'm dancing salsa and jive. What the fuck? Yes. I also found out that there are two types of dance instructors

One...Female...Hot

Two...Male....Gay

But the dude can dance his butt off. Okay, the dancing I really don't mind, the place is also cool (its a rooftop on top of a building, and practices at late evening), besides it's just a week. BUT the fact that Rukshi is also there makes keep the wrong foot. Argh. Why do I have to go through the feelings all over again. I need to take the move on pill. Real bad. So I danced, with her. As much as the awkwardness that surrounded, I really didn't want that dance to end. I wished it to last a milisecond longer than eternity. But it didn't.

I took the bus back home, and a night bus ride is the perfect thing I needed at that time. Travelled the footboard, and the wind was forcing its way through my body, as I shapeshifted from side to side. Rukshi to me is not a bus ride, I thought I could get off at my halt, but it looks like the halt has come and gone.
Anyways, Kudos to March, Keep me happy.

Birthday on Sunday. FYI. =P

Say What You Need To Say

The Match. Yes, the Match. Sri Lanka vs. Pakistan. Is all I can think of now, just a few hours ago I was standing there in the crowds with Chey, AJ, Sabba, Kaveesh and Jackson, shouting out the last bit of air our sorry lungs had to offer, and feeling the vibe take over our bodies. Crazy is not the word to say how much fun we had. But how much more fun that 11 runs could have made it.

But, the match wasn't the only thing I was thinking of in the morning. We had the concert auditions, and again I let my Utopian thinking blind some important things. But why do I always have to screw something up, the tiniest of things I fail to overlook and Boom! The outcome is always a compromise, or letting my ears take the toll of pretty rough scolding, while my senses wonder without cause. But the time the guys from Moir sang 'Say what you need to say' my senses were in full swing. I was sitting behind her... listening to the song and it took me over. It broke through my defenses and came right at my heart. The memories, The moments, The glances, The stares, The smiles, The what-evers, The annoyed look, and The pain! It all came rushing back to me through the hole that was now growing in my heart.

I do the stupidest of things when I'm wandering at heart, I kicked her chair! She looked back, and smiled. God I need to rebuild the brick wall that I laid between my heart and her. You see God gives us the Kodak moments, but not the camera! It's up to us to capture it!

Damn. And I thought this post is dedicated to the Match. What I am doing. It should be!
1.00 o'clock got to the stadium. 1.30 made friends with two English visitors while Kaveesh was swearing at them in the earliest sinhala, while shaking hands =P Had fun there. Walked up the stairs and I stepped onto the last step and lifted my head..

Silence. The feeling was so powerful I swear I was taken back a step. I glanced at the Keththarama Stadium in all it's glory, it was packed to the brim. Sri Lankan flags everywhere. The feeling I got when I took the glance at the stadium was epic. This is my motherland, Our people and to us Sri Lankans, This is our game! Everybody chants the same mathra of victory. Unity and Spirit at a maximum. Over here, The guy who's girlfriend you made out with and got into shit would probably come and give you a hug. Cause at the grounds, Everyone has only one thing on their minds. Nothing else!

Trust me this is the perfect way to spend your day, or night! The bros had an awesome time. Win or Loose, and this one we did almost win, the fun is what counts. Being there as the Lions brace themselves, and cheering them on, as they play the most beautiful thing man has ever created: Cricket

Cricket is Life. The moments of glory. The moments of setback. Jubilation of victory with pride, and Acceptance of defeat with heart. Cricket makes a man!

Ps- After the match, did a commando style jump into Chetha's jeep cause it wasn't allowed to park on the road. It sped away while all of us ran after it and opened the doors while moving and jumped in!!!! Yes just as crazy as it sounds.

To Cricket and to my never ending woes of the other kind.

Photos
a. Sabir and Me
ai. The magnificent R Premadasa Stadium
aii. 6..4...6...4
aiv. Right after Sanga's wicket

Your Sinhala

I swim alone,

The sea of guilt,

Fighting the tides,

Of thought and emotion,

My gene of expression,

Mutilated eternally.

And,

Every time you smile,

Every time you cry,

Most of all,

Every time you try,

I taste the salt,

Flooding my senses,

Choking me to death.

But,

Every time you speak,

In 'your' sinhala,

The salt turns to sugar,

Sweet sweet sugar,

Flooding my senses,

Choking me to death,

Yet the taste remains.

---------------------------

Aaji Aiya!

I now publicly disprove the theory that it takes hours or days of company, to make a good friend. Today we made a friend and I doubt I'd ever meet somebody more genuine. Aaji aiya, the happy-go-lucky, tuk tuk driver. I'd rather not call him a tuk tuk driver cause that would marginalize him to a different class of people. A rather uncanny class. But to us he was in a class of his own. Psycho to the maximum, chases girls (wearing the fardha) and not money, and ready for anything. This is my one lined description of him after just 1 or 2 hours of company. So how did we bump into Aaji?

Simple. We needed a papare band to bring the spirit up at ISAC 2011. First, Second or Last it doesn't matter, we always keep up the spirit. Kasun, Chetha and I set out in search of a trumpet player, and enter 'Aaji'. The first tuk tuk we stopped. First impression to us was that he's a chronic, and the typical crack pot but that impression soon changed. The guy got us to a place and asked us to follow him. I'll never forget that experience, walking through the narrowest of alleys, past towels hang on cloth lines, through block houses that merely had more than one room. We were in the slums of Colombo. Little known to us Aaji took us to the heart of it. Every word spoken on this turf was tamil, neither me, Chetha nor Kasun knew anything expect how to swear in tamil. And the bit we knew, if used there, could have got us killed. Lol.

We came to a brightly colored house and two tamil women came out, we talked over a deal for drums at 2000 bucks O_o... Out of the tiniest slit in that house I saw a pretty face. It's strange how even in the musk of this livelihoods, the most charming of flowers can bloom. A pretty young girl shyly laughing at our broken tamil. I was taken back for a second, my heart melted naively. Beauty has no Background. Got the drums. But I had to leave my ID card, my sole identity with them. A risk I took back there.

Drums ok. But trumpet. Aaji the man, who we met merely 10 minutes before, took us around Colombo. The guy knew each and every one on the road, the brotherhood within this community was striking. It's beyond par to the brotherhood we have inculcated amongst ourselves. It's something we can learn from. All along the way Aaji was going on about how he knew the president and his prospects in politics. Hehe. Apparently he's a father of four, yet still has no burden in life. The fun we had. Cracking jokes at literally everything on the road. It's like we've known him for ages, but he was a complete stranger.

We came to the trumpet place. And the earlier setting seemed way better (solely) in comparison. This place was like a thug hideout.

Aaji: "Malliya ekkenata thama yanna puluwan"

Kasun: "Ehema bae ban"

Me: "Monada ban, api denna bokka ne, dennek yamu?"

Well to this place only one person was allowed, but we talked over for both Me and Kasun to go leaving Chetha behind for a while. We were dealing the prices when we were taken to the Don. A burly, tamil guy, with his breasts hanging below his bellybutton came out quarreling about the prices. A real movie scene. We settled for another 2000 bucks and set out. Well the trumpeter also needed a shot of arrack to play properly. Hehe. We bid goodbye to Aaji and set off.

Looking back, the trouble we had to go through, the 4000 bucks (and 200 for the arrack. lol) was worth every penny. We lifted the spirits up and cheered Gateway on. Yeah we came Second in the meet, but First at heart. The emotions fused with the papare music was inexplicable. It was almost 8 o'clock and we needed to return the drums, get my ID returned and dump the drunk trumpeter. We came out and was surprised to be greeted by Aaji! The guy had come back for us. We all got in his tuk and raced into the night. Cracking his jokes all the way. I got my ID back.

A friend we made that night, who taught us that there's always more to life. These people life lives with little worry and more smiles. Cherishing even the simplest moments in their lives. This carefree tuk tuk driver cum father, showed us that happiness lies within us. It's up to us to reach for it. We may think that we have achieved the summits of our schooling careers, and hold big positions, but are we really happy? True they may not be educated. But is life only about education? Life is about being genuine at heart. To them, life is joy ride. I learned that it's pointless blindly chasing dreams hoping that one day I'll be at peace, because peace is already within me. Aaji was the perfect reality check that I needed, realizing that I have to step on the earth to feel the earth. A day where I realized that Three Sinhala boys, hitched a Muslim tuk tuk man, and negotitated with Tamil band players, over here race and religion doesn't matter.

Thanks to Aaji we pulled it off. I'll never forget this human, for he showed us how to live free, and live life.